The Wrong Environment is Stealing Your Spark
✨ TL;DR:
Many neurodivergents love their work, but the wrong environment kills their creativity.
Dismissal, micromanagement, and lack of autonomy can lead to burnout and self-doubt.
You aren’t “too much,” but you might be in a place that does not value your unique brain.
Even as a biz owner, toxic client dynamics can replicate old wounds. It’s okay to walk away.
Why your job feels so damn soul-crushing
⏰ Read Time: 8 Minutes
When I first heard that quote, something clicked. Like... painfully. Suddenly, I understood why it took me so long to feel like myself after leaving the corporate world. I remembered how I used to wake up full of ideas, only to spend the rest of the day silencing them because I already knew the answer would be “no.” Or worse — a vague “we’ll consider it” followed by months of inaction.
You can love what you do and still feel miserable if the environment is wrong.
I want to share a story about my close friend, who is having her spark snuffed out by a toxic boss.
The wild part? She loves the kind of work she’s doing - strategy, creativity, tangible results - the stuff that lights her up.
But even the most aligned job becomes soul-crushing when surrounded by the wrong people. This is especially true for neurodivergents. When your brain is wired for creative problem-solving, it feels like torture when your boss just wants you to “stay in your lane.” 😒
Your creativity, joy, and drive are not broken — the wrong surroundings are smothering them.
If that’s you — if you’re stuck in a place where your ideas die on the vine, where your ambition is treated like a threat, and where your joy is slipping away one ignored suggestion at a time — this article is for you.
You’re not the problem.
Your environment is.
And you deserve better.
The Hidden Cost of Staying in a Job that Dims Your Light
We hold “doing what you love” as the holy grail of career satisfaction. But let’s be honest — the wrong people can make that feel like dragging your favorite meal through the mud and trying to enjoy it anyway. 🤢
As an ADHDer, you’re likely wired for vision, possibility, connection, pattern recognition, and nonlinear thinking. You see how things could be, not just how they are. You notice inefficiencies and can’t help but propose ways to improve them. That’s part of your brilliance.
In many traditional work environments, there’s a hierarchy to maintain, a chain of command, and a need to “manage optics.” So you’re told to keep your head down, stay in your lane, and be a team player.
Our brains hear: Don’t be too much. Don’t shine too brightly. Don’t make anyone uncomfortable — even if that means dimming yourself.
This article from the Times reports that in the UK, only 31% of neurodivergents are employed, while highlighting that those same professionals increase productivity by 30%! This shows the high value we bring to our work and the shameful reluctance employers have to create inclusive work environments.
Why Neurodivergent Thinkers Struggle in Traditional Workplaces
That friend I mentioned earlier is the kind of person who spots simple, effective solutions that everyone else misses.
She’s not trying to shake things up for the sake of it. She suggests small, thoughtful changes: saving money by buying their most-used materials in bulk and consistent naming conventions. But every time she brings something up, her boss shuts it down. Sometimes with “that’s not a priority,” sometimes with “we’ve always done it this way,” and sometimes with just... silence.
The longer this goes on, the more defeated she feels. She questions her instincts. She wonders if she’s just being annoying. She’s started saying things like, “Maybe they just think I’m stupid.”
And yet, outside of work, everyone comes to her for help. Her brilliance hasn’t gone anywhere. It’s just not being welcomed where she is.
This is what it looks like to love your craft but dread the context. It’s a constant emotional whiplash.
Some signs that the environment, not the work, might be the issue:
Your ideas are routinely ignored, delayed, or downplayed
You feel emotionally drained every night
You stop offering input because you already know it won’t be received
You spend more time managing personalities than doing your actual work
You spend all day Sunday with a pit in your stomach
You constantly wonder if you’re the problem
Spoiler: you’re not. 👏
You want to contribute deeply, think strategically, and create solutions. You’re just not allowed to, and it hurts your sense of self.
How to Spot a Toxic Client (and What to Do About It)
Sometimes, the problem isn’t that you work for someone else.
Sometimes, the problem is… you’re still letting other people call the shots.
Maybe already started your business. You escaped the job that drained you, started your own thing, and finally got the freedom you dreamed about. But somehow, you’re still overwhelmed. Still doubting yourself. Still quietly resenting the work.
If that’s the case, I want you to ask yourself something:
Are your clients giving you the same feeling your old boss did?
⏰ Maybe they cancel meetings at the last minute, throwing off your day.
🗂 Maybe they keep expanding the scope but never the pay.
☎️ Maybe they expect you to reply to messages at all hours — even when you’ve set clear boundaries.
Bad clients are just as damaging as bad bosses.
Let this be your reminder: you’re the boss now. Your needs matter just as much as your clients. If someone consistently drains, disrespects, or disregards you, letting them go is okay (and wise!).
Because the right clients are out there — the ones who value your ideas, stick to timelines and make work feel fun again. But they need you to be available — energetically and literally. Firing the wrong ones makes space for the right ones to show up.
Let it be easy. Let it be yours.
Everything Changes When You Work With the Right People
Imagine this: you’re meeting with a client and suggesting a creative solution to a problem they’ve been stuck on. Their face lights up 💡 “That’s brilliant,” they say. “Can we try that next week?”
When you run your business and intentionally choose your clients, you attract people who want your insight. They’re excited by your outside-the-box thinking, appreciate your drive, and see your curiosity and initiative as strengths, not threats.
It doesn’t mean everything’s easy. Entrepreneurship comes with its own set of challenges. But being appreciated for how your brain works? That’s life-changing.
You don’t need to ask permission to improve something.
You don’t have to shrink to protect someone else’s ego.
You don’t need to prove that your way is valid — you just get to do it.
Back to my friend, if she left her current job and took even a fraction of her talents to her own creative business, she’d absolutely thrive. She could focus on the types of systems she’s passionate about. She could work with clients who are craving what she brings to the table. She could build an environment that supports her. She could love work again.
And you can, too.
Stop Blaming Yourself — Start Noticing the Pattern
If you’re constantly feeling frustrated, stuck, underutilized, or creatively numb, it might not be because you’re not good enough. It might be because you’re in the wrong environment.
We all want to be the changemaker. We want to stay and make things better. But if the people around you resist change - if they actively push back against your energy - eventually that friction wears you down.
Let me say this clearly: You are not the problem. You are not too much.
💭 Reflective Prompts
If this resonates with you, try journaling on one or more of these:
When was the last time I felt energized by my work? Who was around me?
Where have I been shrinking myself to fit someone else’s comfort?
What would it feel like to build my personal work ecosystem where I’m the decision-maker?
Suppose you’re craving more clarity on what that next step looks like (making your current situation liveable, launching something on your own, or just mapping out your options). In that case, I offer Momentum Mapping to help creatives like you get unstuck and move forward again.
Because you deserve to feel creative, capable, and in control of your work again.
